Sometimes life can just be so shitty... I've upset her, made her cry and worst of all, said words that I don't mean to... only to realise at the end of the day, it only made us more and more distant.
What's the point? What's wrong with me? What's all in my mind is that I kept thinking that things aren't going smoothly, no matter how much I've worked and it's never enough. Never.
What if I'm jobless... what will happen? I don't dare to say... cus in the end, I'll still be feeling lousy. I hate it. What's wrong... Can't things just be right for once?
I don't know how to face her from now on... a broken and upset heart is what I see on her face...
In short, I'm just useless and at times,
I wish my existence is not recognised at all.
I'm really really sorry...
...
Uncertainties vs Stability.
I hate it... when there's uncertainties in a
rship. Is it because I've fallen too deep to the extent that I'm afraid of losing... Or the reason is just me...
Assurance, stability, happiness, loved... that's what I wish for.
But sometimes, it just takes two to clap and I hope I will get the answer in time to come.
Getting too emo at times will only make others worried, especially him.
I do not want to, I do not wish to. All I hope for is that HE will be happy.
"a couple that smiles tgt, will stay tgt."
